10 everyday struggles of useless people

I hope I’m not the only person that frequently experiences the following.

  1. Putting the kettle on to boil to make a cup of tea, deciding to sit down on the couch while you wait for it to be done, and coming back two hours later only to need to boil it again.
  2. Forgetting that you put a load of washing on but didn’t hang it out, until the moment you get into bed.
  3. Having the smoke alarm go off every time you have a shower at a balmy 80 degrees Celsius.
  4. Waking up in the middle of the night needing to pee, but holding it until the morning as you refuse to get out of bed because it’s so freaking cold.
  5. Forgetting to turn your weekday alarm off on the weekend.
  6. Going into the fridge for your eighth chocolate biscuit, and just shutting the door on yourself to hide your shame.
  7. Finishing cooking the taco mince and chopping all the sides, only to realize you didn’t buy taco shells. Subsequently trying to get away with serving mince in folded pieces of bread instead.
  8. Hitting the cash out button at the checkout and forgetting to take your twenty quid with you. Then spending the next week thinking about how many chocolate biscuits you could have bought with it.
  9. Accidentally taking the wrong turn at the end of your street while you’re on autopilot, and ending up at your local grocery store instead of to work.
  10. Spending two hours trawling Urban Dictionary, trying to figure out the conversation you had with a nineteen year old on your lunch break.

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